Trousers

• Posted by: Charlie McCallum
• Created: October 28, 2016
• 0

Trousers: by Charlie Mac

Now trousers come 

In many different types

Even in tartan

For playing the pipes

The toffs, they buy them

In a tweed fae Harris

An the rich folks get them

Way doon in Paris

Some folks wear them

Wi shoulder braces

An the farmers dinny worry

Even if they’re tied up with laces

What aboot they cowboys

Wi twa blazin guns

U’ll no catch them shrinkin

Their 501’s

The golfers wear checks

And think they look rair

But they really look like Andy Capp

Crossed wi Rupert the Bear

And that Marilyn Munroe

She wore them well

Miby a tad too tight

Cos she started to swell

There’s even a pair

With straps an a bib

Comes in real handy

When eatin a king rib

But being a Scotsman

The kilts what I choose

But with a pair of tackety boots

Instead of they fancy shoes

Now I’ll gie you a wee tip

If ur no wearing boxers

Dinny be pullin it up

Tae under your oxters

And ye can wear it with pride

Even with knock knees

But just dinny sit doon

Among nettles or bees

And it’s a real hit wi the lassies

When yir oot at the dance

Especially when they ken

Yir no wearing pants!!!

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