I am tired of hiding them.
Tired of trying to contain them.
Tired of trying to stop them.
Tired of having them constantly trying to break out.
Tired of these emotions, tired of everything.
How long can I hide them away for?
How long until I can actually find someone to pour it out to without being judged?
It hurts, its like a needle being pointed, not only pointed but already inches into my heart, waiting to stop the suffering beating of it.
The rhythm of my pulse ringing to the pain soaring through my body, the pain of trauma.
Words struggling to come out, sounds being muted like I’m screaming inside a vacuum. No air to breath.
Can You Hear ME?
No one understands, emotions tangled, everything messed up.
What is it? What is this feeling?
Can You Feel it?
I want to express, I want to ran away, escape, chase, live, EXPLORE.
So what’s limiting me?
Life gave me a family but the same family made it hard for me to face the life god gave me.
I don’t feel anything anymore.
I’ve poured myself out to a soulless blank screen that’s reflecting the face of a worn out teenager. Exhausted. At the edge of giving everything up but still looking for hope in her. Eyes with a tint of red, tears been overworked, eyebags become heavier than before. Lips swollen, cheeks puffed, mind overdriven and grating thoughts gyrating.
Sleep deprived. Loss of motivation. Despair. What is life?
But one thing I do know, is that I am no writer. I’ll give you that.
-Nobody waiting to become somebody