The vessel of a betrayed heart

My mind is playing tricks on me

Trying to trust and get a grip on life but my emotions is bound by fear I need to be set free!

I’m part of a bigger picture I keep telling myself daily

God has called me to a greater purpose but why do I keep failing?

Clutching my hands into the dirt of what has happened in my yesterday

Trying to work it out…yes I know I can hear you say ‘just let it go and move on’ but yet I lay

In a pool of pain! Drawing me in by my very skin…tearing me to shreds!

My heart…drips with blood…every time another piece is ripped out! Through endless cycles I’m being led

Like a zombie…my mind is not my own!

I’ve tried taking it back but I keep on finding myself in the enemy’s zone??

I can love! I was made to love! I promise I’m capable to love…

If only I can trust myself to be loved and embrace it like a perfect fit glove

But fear has stolen my heart and makes it’s choices…why?

I know God has given me a free will to choose but why deep down inside I feel like I want to die?

I know I have this treasure locked up inside of me

I need to let go of this pain and forever from it be set free!

But how? What’s the process and steps I need to take?

I’m so drained of living a life in the past that it’s nothing but fake!

I can be what Christ has called me to be!

I can be loved and cared for by someone special you’ll see!

The pain you caused was not the end of me but just the beginning of the rest of my life!

Today I stop the pain of my yesterday and I’m saying no more to strife!

I’m alive, I’m loved, I’m amazingly special…I’m a daughter of the Most High

And even though I’m a vessel of a betrayed heart, because of Christ I no longer feel like I want to die!

I decree and declare life and not death in every sphere of who I am

I’ve closed the doors of hurt and pain and my joys and hopes are waiting to burst open like a shut up dam!

I’m more! I’m greater because of Him and I’m set free

No need for pretending anymore for He gives me the freedom to just be me…

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