In Death

She only saw my first born child

My mum, that is, before she died

My memory of that abject time

Is pastel shades and pantomime

I acted from a well worn script

The cup of pretence often sipped

I changed my masks when it required

I chose the one that you desired

I rang that day, I already knew

No more days or nights for you

No more shopping, no more shoes

No battle to win, no war to lose.

Your pain released, your soul departed

My soul subdued, my pain just started

The vultures await the final call

It's part of a devine plan for all

Sing out, extol your pseudo king

Be lifted by thine angels wing

You validate your book of lies

There is no light in darkened skies

I heard no angels pave the way

You're full of shit, now go away

Cards and letters, flowers and prayer

Futile gestures, I don't care

The one thing that was real has left

I'm empty, shaken, confused, bereft

Stoma, vomit, morphine drips

Mutated cells and water sips

Camera Obscura, upside down

A sea of tears to help me drown

As time moves on I feel it more 

Lost in that sea without an oar

I'm angry, saddened, weakened, numb

You gave me life, I miss you Mum

In Death

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