Some days I can't do anything. Not because I don't want to, but because my mind won't let me. I've got to stay, stay, stay, in bed until it feels I am merely existing And I wish I hadn't existed. No, it doesn't make me feel alive But at that point I can hardly survive You see, not everything is what we want. No matter how many demons haunt. I am afraid of what will happen if I keep living What will happen? The thought is daunting This is not what I was wanting Now I'm back in the hole of depression and there's no one to help me out. The thoughts are suffocating Myself I am hating. Part of me wants to stay in here until I die But the other half has hope I will fly Out of this dark place and into the light I still have some fight.