December 1st 1957

alternate title: debut of Amelie Beth Harris - McGeehan

 

First borne progeny to the late Harriet and current octogenarian widower Boyce Harris

her birth delivered more than the sum total of a healthy baby girl, she gurgled with content

ment asper the center of attention for thirteen plus months until thee debut of this author,

whose birth (mine) automatically designated said offspring as “big” sister, who would

instinctively evince the role of pseudo mother, when this extremely bashful boy bore being

bruited by bullies, whence she served as protector and barrier reef to cushion thyself, who

suffered extreme vulnerability when thrown a figurative sucker punch (and at times threatened

with getting hammered to a pitiful pulp) by brutes who found me a convenient target. The

disadvantage standing like a whisper in the wind exhibiting extreme introverted ness (only re-cent

lee strongly linkedin to biochemical disparity), and to top off avalanche of denigrating assault this

wordsmith subject to the unfair incursions of all manner of venal, verbal and veracious vocalizations,

I spoke with a severe nasal arising from congenital defect (during the onset of prepubescence)

identified as a submucous cleft palate, which essentially constituted a split uvula whereby two halves

of what ought to be a singular elongated fraction of an inch tear drop shaped tissue played havoc,

when every now and again spontaneous bursts of utterances took place pronounced nasality a cap

stone in tandem to afore mentioned characteristics. This current voluntarily solitary older papa reflects

how hue man mix of genetic primary colors red deuced his fighting spirit reduced him to yell low wing

silent blue in the face retorts, which constant besieging deplorable fiendish hate jabbering tinder fueling

internal discord, and exacerbating a pre dilection toward rapier renting social withdrawal, temptation

toward self starvation easily provoked when self esteem, confidence and acceptance of self already

at an all time low setting the stage for psychic fracture, and tis only of late that salient strengths plus

health of body, mind and spirit prized, relished and valued sprung immeasurable from love of eldest

sibling, whose needling when mine existence akin to a bridge over troubled water, now with 20/20

hindsight recognizes such misinterpretations as bothersome frequent meddling merely attempted to

express care and concern toward this sole brother, whose behavior when figuratively dangling from

tender hooks bore witness to maturation of deux darling daughters clearly understood while slogging

thru the trials and tribulations of fatherhood brought revelations sans how pained mother, father and

sister felt, when helplessness found Matthew Scott Harris to writhe in despair preferring short cut viz

demise via anorexia nervosa than experiencing plethora of positive opportunities to foster childhoods’

end, and segway into vibrant young adult, which remembrance or things past dredges up Proust chin

wince of sadness at forsaking manifold glee instead reacting by hermetically sealing thyself more

exhausting than if early life lived with active anchors re: esprit de corps, thus now each day holds value

even if occupied with routine matters, where self actualization finds me striving to deliver measure of

selflessness and payback to worthy persons, who played a pivotal role aiding importance

of this perceptive person.

December 1st 1957

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Related entries

Because Angels Are In White…

The poem is on Doctors who were heroes to us in the time of Covid-19

The Book is Being Written

How we observe and how we reflect.

The Dreary Faceless

The observations and reflections of a traveller in a foreign land.

The Model House

The facades of a perfect home.

The Woman Who

This peom is about a woman in my life, who is suppose to be there for me but is not.